This Is Our Normal
by murphystarr
Summary: Tadashi worried about Hiro before, but his anxieties multiplied tenfold when he had signed the papers to become his legal guardian at the courthouse a few months ago after the sudden death of their parents. It may have not been what he had expected his normal to turn out, but it was their normal, and they somehow made it work.


_surprise bitch I bet you thought you saw the last of me_

Hello from London! I wrote this a few weeks ago for uponagraydawn on tumblr for her Family of Two AU (which is both hella rad and hella sad), but since y'all have been so patient with my sudden absence I thought I'd upload it on here.

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><p>Tadashi was a nice person. He never went out of his way to purposely inflict negativity on anyone, that was the way that his parents had raised him. He would be the one to hold doors open for little old ladies and would flash them a smile when they would thank him. But after forcing smiles for over ten hours, he didn't think he could even manage to crack a genuine grin.<p>

He practically deflated, thankful for the relief that the somewhat decent bus seat gave for his aching feet. He had been up since six am, and somehow managed to get himself and Hiro out the door at seven, both dressed, but with Hiro's hair not-so-brushed. Somewhat prepared to face the day, the brothers parted ways with a tight hug, and a hot pocket in each hand. It wasn't the breakfast of champions that his mother used to prepare for her boys, but it was the only thing that Tadashi could make to ensure his 7:30 clock in time at Maru Mart.

He hated his job at the supermarket. Hate hate _hated_ it. Everything about it made him want to tear his hair out. He could put up with the the toddlers screaming for candy, checking every single perishable food item's expiration date and retrieving carts from the far end of the parking lot. What never failed to put him in a bad mood overall was how the customers treated him. He had them scream in his face too many times, drawing all the eyes in the supermarket to his lane as they told him that it didn't matter that it was a discount item, it should still be accepted with a coupon. He would then calmly state why it wasn't possible, but the customer was always right, and always got their way when they threatened to speak with the manager.

But his labor put clothes on the brothers' backs and food in their bellies. And along with his part-time jobs that he had on the weekend, Tadashi could pay the bills and get the rent in on time. And it's all that really mattered. He could live with wiping stranger spit off his face and cleaning up after unsupervised children.

Tadashi slugged up the three flights of stairs in their apartment complex, fishing for his keys and silently hoping that Hiro hadn't made too much of a mess since he got back from school.

He hated leaving his little brother in the apartment by himself when he was away. He hated leaving him alone in general, especially since he had grown pretty clingy since their parents' car was T-boned a few months ago. Hiro pretty much stuck to Tadashi's side whenever he could, shadowing him around the apartment. He was positive that if given the opportunity, Hiro would've followed Tadashi to work every day. The social worker had told Tadashi that it was perfectly normal when he had brought it up during one of their monthly visits, his younger brother was just grieving.

It was a reasonable explanation. Hiro had usually prided himself on being fiercely self-sufficient. He hated being coddled by anyone, even the idea of participating in a hug was enough to make him cringe. His mother had been a hugger, and she made an effort to show it every day by smothering her boys with hugs and kisses every chance she got. Hiro often got the worst of it. He would be lasered in on his homework or too busy tinkering with a new invention to notice his mother sneaking behind him. She would then engulf her youngest in her arms, peppering the side of his face with kisses.

"Oh my God, _mom_! Let me go! Stop it! Can you not?!"

She would just squeeze him tighter, cackling at Hiro's futile attempts to escape the vice grip she had around his shoulders. Tadashi could hear his younger brother all the way in his room upstairs, yelling that he wasn't a baby anymore. He was in high school now, and therefore, too grownup for hugs.

But like the dashboard of Hamada family car, Hiro let his pride shatter that night. He clung to his remaining family member whenever he was given the chance. From the wake and funeral to the gathering at their childhood home, Hiro absolutely refused to leave his brother's side. He kept a firm grip on Tadashi's hand as he delivered the eulogy to his parent's friends and colleagues. He felt unpleasant tingles travel up his arm as Hiro's knuckles turned whiter, but Tadashi just returned the squeeze with a little less vigor.

He had no problem at all returning Hiro's sudden affection. Tadashi didn't want to admit it, but he needed the physical reassurance as much as his little brother did. He hugged his brother back after each nightmare he had, listening to Hiro's vivid description of his unpleasant dream between choppy breaths and sobs. It was always the same dream that reduced Hiro to his miserable state. Hiro would be walking by himself-in the park, down the street, anywhere-and he would suddenly see Tadashi materialize in front of him. He would reach out for his older brother, but he would start running ahead of him. It didn't matter how fast Hiro would try to catch up, how much his lungs burned or how loud he screamed, Tadashi wouldn't slow down, turn around, or answer Hiro's cries.

After what seemed like an eternity, Hiro would suddenly lurch forward, grabbing a fistful of Tadashi's blazer. At the impact of his touch, his older brother would begin to crack. The cloth in his hand would shatter, and the force from the break would trail up and around his body. Within seconds, every square inch of Tadashi was etched in white lines, almost resembling broken glass. No matter how much Hiro begged or pleaded, his older brother would give a soft smile, and shatter right before his eyes.

The nightmare never failed to wake up both brothers. Hiro from the sheer torture that the dream put him through, and Tadashi from the surprisingly loud screams that erupted out of his brother's tiny throat. They would spend the rest of the night, or morning, on the couch, with Hiro's lanky arms curled tightly around his brother's solid form, weeping into his shoulder as Tadashi whispered reassuring nonsense into his ear.

They weren't as common as they were during the first month, but the bad dreams still haunted Hiro all the same. Tadashi hated seeing his brother being driven to such a state, and did everything he possibly could to make him feel safe and comfortable. Overall, he hated the look on Hiro's face when they needed to part ways in the morning after a nightmare. He tried to make their separation a little easier with a "last hug", and it immediately became part of their morning ritual, nightmare or not.

Tadashi slid his key into the lock, silently preparing himself for the calamity that Hiro had undoubtedly brought upon their apartment. He tried to keep their small space as organized as possible, their social worker had been breathing down his neck about the unkemptness ever since she'd been assigned to the brothers. Hiro had been lectured about the state of his room multiple times, and while he tried to keep his bedroom somewhat organized, he wasn't as much of a fan of sucking up for the social worker like Tadashi was. So what if he liked to use the kitchen table as his workbench? It wasn't _her_ responsibility to tell Hiro to clean up after himself. Nor was it her job to tell Tadashi how to raise him. It may have said it in her job description, but through Hiro's eyes, she just brought trouble and unwanted anxiety into their already unsteady life. He had let her know that once, and he'd gotten an earful from Tadashi later that night.

What Tadashi didn't expect to see when he opened the door was a somewhat tame living room. Hiro was sitting on the rug, surround by thousands of Lego bricks. He was in the middle of what appeared to be an elaborate project, constructing dozens of little towers and arranging them to look like a city. Tadashi knew that whenever Hiro threw himself into something, pretty much nothing would break his focus. But no matter what, Hiro always kept an ear open for the door, and immediately perked up at the sound of his brother coming home.

"Tadashi!"

The twelve-year-old popped up, then began leaping over Lego towers as he charged across the living room to greet his brother. Tadashi quickly noted that Hiro was wearing his sweatshirt backwards, and left enough room between their chests for the ferret that was most likely occupying the hood. Sure enough, the familiar odor of the lanky mustelidae crept into Tadashi's nostrils, making him gag.

"You need to give him a bath soon," Tadashi said once he was released from his brother's embrace. "He stinks really bad."

Hiro just rolled his eyes as he drug the white ferret out of his hoodie. "Baymax doesn't smell, Tadashi. He's perfectly clean. I gave him a bath last month."

Tadashi pretended to heave. He almost did when Hiro shoved Baymax underneath his nose, then took in a deep breath. He blissfully hummed, nuzzling Baymax's stomach against his face.

"That's _so_ disgusting." Tadashi let out another gag as he began to unbutton the vest of his uniform. "_You're_ disgusting."

Hiro blew a raspberry. "Whatever. He's clean, though. Ferrets don't need baths that often." He returned Baymax to his favorite napping spot while heading back to his plastic construction site. Tadashi turned on his heel, making a beeline for the kitchen. His mother's trusty tea kettle was still on the counter, waiting for Tadashi to indulge himself in his favorite post-work routine.

"How was school?" He called out before hearing a scoff.

"Torture," Hiro replied, not even bothering to look up from his building. After being stuck at that place for a long seven and a half hours, school was the last thing he wanted to think about. "How was work?"

"Torture." Tadashi filled the kettle with water, snapping it off when it reached the right amount. "You want a cup?"

"Sure."

He rooted through the shoebox on the counter where they kept their teabags, then pulled out two packets. He stifled a yawn as he continued prepping the drinks, making sure to pull out Hiro's favorite Stitch cup. He really needed a nap.

After setting the kettle on the heating stove, he returned to the living room, where Hiro hadn't looked up from his project. He had begun to construct what looked like a bridge, using pieces of twine for the cables.

"What in the world are you building?"

Hiro didn't let his eyes tear away from his work. "Downtown San Fransokyo."

Tadashi carefully stepped over the Lego buildings, making his way to the couch. "Any reason why?"

He shrugged, snapping a piece into its designated place. "I was bored? Do I really need a reason?"

"No." Tadashi took a moment to take in Hiro's creation that had spanned to all four corners of the rug. "It's really impressive. Beyond incredible."

He wasn't lying. From the rail system to the electronic billboards, Hiro had taken careful consideration to include as many details as possible of the downtown area. He replicated as much as he could with the plastic blocks, but some things required more flexibility. Such as Tadashi's blue cardigan that was currently being used as the ocean.

Hiro beamed. "Thanks. I've been working on it for a while. You wanna help?"

Tadashi arched backwards, letting a tired moan escape from his throat as a round of satisfying pops squeezed out from in between his vertebrae. Oh, how _good_ that felt on his back. Hiro peeked up at him, concern washing over his face.

"Unless you want to take a nap first. You sound like you need one."

"No, no no no..." Tadashi protested, taking a seat next to Hiro. "I'm fine." He reached out for a handful of Legos, surprised when Hiro swiped them out of his reach. He craned his head, eying his brother suspiciously as he guarded the Legos behind him. "Hiro?"

"You really don't have to play with me," he meekly muttered, picking at the loose strands that stuck out of the rug, anything to avoid his older brother's questionable look. "You had a long day at work, I _get_ it. You're tired. Go take a nap or something."

Tadashi let out a long breath. He would've loved nothing more to take up on his brothers offer. He had been looking forward to sleeping since he had woken up that morning, but playing with Hiro was more important to him than extra an hour of two of rest. They hardly interacted like they used to before their parents died and when Tadashi was still in SFIT. Back when all Tadashi had to worry about were term papers and all night cramming sessions and wether or not he could convince his dad to let him use the car that Friday night. Now, his worries were consistent with those of a parent. He was concerned wether or not he could get the rent in on time, or if they had enough to spare for the ever-growing grocery bill. New concerns were tacked on for Hiro as well: like if he "remembered" to do his homework or if he brushed his teeth that morning. He worried about those things before, but they had multiplied tenfold when he had signed the papers to become his legal guardian at the courthouse those months ago.

It may have not been what he had expected his normal to be, but it was their normal, and they somehow made it work. Even if Hiro didn't turn in his English project on time or if they had to eat instant noodles for dinner the third time that week.

Tadashi rolled his head backwards, trying to formulate a good reason to explain why he would prefer to play with his little brother instead of accepting the nap offer that they both knew he wanted desperately. He simply lulled his head to the side, trying to look as wake as he possibly could.

"You're always saying how I don't play with you anymore."

"Yeah, but-"

"But nothing." He reached over, scooping a handful of blocks off the floor. "I'll build the ramen house. You wanna do the robotics museum when you're done with the bridge?"

He began snapping the Legos together, ignoring Hiro's pleas for him to go to sleep. The youngest Hamada eventually gave up on persuading his older brother, huffing as he continued replicating the famous landmark. He peeked out of the corner of his eye every few minutes to check on Tadashi, making sure that he was staying true to his word of staying awake. He was strangely focused on assembling the buildings, taking small breaks to rub his sore fingertips. Hiro slowly adjusted to the idea of having his older brother help him with his project, and pretty soon he began opening up about his day.

"...And then after the bell rings Ms. O'Brian announces that we'll be dissecting frogs next week, I need you to sign that permission slip by the way, and I swear, one girl looked like she was going to _puke_! I can understand why she'd be grossed out, but they're just frog guts! We used to poke at roadkill when we were kids, remember that Tadashi?"

He waited for his brother to chime in, but he went unanswered. Hiro turned his head, seeing Tadashi where he was the last time he check in on him. On his stomach, starting on assembling the San Fransokyo ports.

"Tadashi?"

He didn't respond. Hiro scooted over to his brother, but he already knew that Tadashi was out cold. He loomed over his form, seeing his face in a state of bliss. His eyes were closed shut and his breathing was deep and even. Hiro let his hands drop to his lap, sadly watching his brother catch up on his well deserved rest.

Baymax suddenly stirred, crawling out of the hood. He climbed up to Hiro's shoulder, then placed his tiny paws on his master's face. Hiro gave a tiny smile when the ferret started licking his cheek, trying to help improve his mood in the best way he could. He scratched at Baymax's head, who in turn started to lap up Hiro's lone tear that somehow managed to sneak out from the corner of his eye. The tea kettle suddenly whistled, echoing throughout the tiny apartment.

_Looks like it's gonna be tea for one_, Hiro thought as he pulled himself off the floor to answer the call, _again_.

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><p>Poor Tadashi. That boy needs a hug and three days of uninterrupted sleep.<p>

Baymax was a rat in my original headcanon post but I changed him to a ferret because _ferrets man_. I imagine that he comforts Hiro whenever he's sad, like licking his hands and face and sappy junk like that bc he can detect neruotransmitter levels haha


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